What it means to belong to God...

Belonging to Christ means you lost the right to take your talents, opportunities and experiences and run off in any direction you please. But why would you even want to? What could possibly be more fulfilling than God’s purpose for your life? And what could be more tragic than missing it? You can’t wring enough meaning out of secular accomplishments to satisfy your soul. The hole you’re trying to fill has an eternal dimension only Christ can fill. That’s why you must pray, ‘Lord, show me Your vision for my life'

This was last Saturday's devotional. 

A lot to think about in this short paragraph. 

Secret heart

I realized that whenever my heart cries out for God in my most desperate moments, He always send short glimmers of hope like post-it notes to remind me that he is everpresent.

He knows the desires of my heart. 

Lord, I will say it again, if it is not Your will, please give me the courage and peace to accept Your version of "no". 

Letting God work in me

Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded' (James 4:7-8 NKJV). God will do His part, but you must do yours. God will extend grace to you, but you must act on it. - Word for Today 

Recurring theme this week, let God work in you. I'm just too stubborn and I always let my emotions rage on first before calling out to Him. 

Back from my charging station - Seoul

Thoughts at 1:30am about being almost 30.

I just got back from Korea and I feel that whenever I'm there, I'm not touring, experiencing the attractions, sightseeing. I'm mainly there to regain some balance within myself by spending a good amount of time being alone and at the same time spending time with dear friends that have been a part in defining the Camille that I am today. 

Its been almost 13 years that I have known these people. This trip to Korea made me reminisce and feel sentimental about how we used to be and how we are now. 

Our spending habits are different now compared to when I first started coming to Korea some winters ago. Back then, our budget for food would only be 3000-5000won tops and that would probably consist of cheese ramyeon, ddukbokki or bibimbap. Nowadays, our priorities are different. We now think about which has the most amount of veggies, or which is the most beneficial for our health and of course since Uri is pregnant, which will best suit her taste and the baby. 

I was never the type who had goals set on what I should have accomplished when I'm 30 back when I was younger. Now I just feel.. Oh so this is how late 20s feels like. It's pretty okay. I feel okay. Life is good. 

I'm just going to try to sit back and enjoy the ride. Life and God has so much in store for me. I have learned the past few weeks as its a consistent message thats been recurring that I need not worry. I need not be anxious. To stay faithful to God's plan for my life is what I need to do. How I will achieve it is by keeping my promises to my mission in life and continuously pray to God to lead me and my actions. 

This is the end of my Easter thoughts. Now, I must rest. Tomorrow, we hustle.

Saviour, please

Times are tough nowadays... 

This song makes me cry but comforts me at the same time. Another one ny Josh Wilson..

Savior, please take my hand

I work so hard, I live so fast

This life begins, and then it ends

And I do the best that I can, but I don't know how long I'll last

I try to be so tough

But I'm just not strong enough

I can't do this alone, God I need You to hold on to me

I try to be good enough

But I'm nothing without Your love

Savior, please keep saving me

Savior, please help me stand

I fall so hard, I fade so fast

Will You begin right where I end

And be the God of all I am because You're all I have

Hallelujah

Everything You are to me

Is everything I'll ever need

And I am learning to believe

That I don't have to prove a thing

'Cause You're the one who's saving me

Gotta love Josh Wilson

I've been so addicted to listening to Josh Wilson's songs lately.

I would listen to his playlist on Spotify every morning as I get ready to go to work...

His playlist is full of relatable Christian songs and they are absolutely beautiful...



Last weekend was when I discovered this gem of a playlist and found myself crying as I was driving home. His songs are just so on-point... It's either that or... I'm just extremely PMS-ing.

I am grateful that God made me in a way that I recover and regenerate from being emotiononally and psychologically wounded fast. 

Yesterday was my 2nd consecutive Sunday attending Church at the 11am am Chinese mass at Megamall. I find that its such a treasure finding a mass so solemn I was compelled to take notes because of all the messages God was telling me. 

Being emotionally, physically and psychologically tired the past weeks, this one hour prayer and time with God fully regenerated me and I find myself stronger and inspired.

I know that I don't believe in finding external motivation because I know it all has to come from our willpower to be better and God is the only source of that for me. He delivers messages to me in the most unexpected places and situations. 

I thank God that I am able to find inspiration in the simplest places. 

Well, that was powerful

"I drove home pondering how He illuminates the darkest journey... how pity parties keep me from savouring life's sweetness... then asking forgiveness for my selfish attitudes. It was a powerful reminder that one day life will be complete on the sunny side of the street... in Heaven, where there's no darkness, disease or death"-Jane Johnson Struck

There are days when you feel as if just by waking up and continue on living, it's already the bravest thing to do.

There are big struggles, however, it's the small day to day decisions to live that is the most meaningful to overcome.

These kinds of feelings just remind me to refocus and to put my heart on the strength that is blessed upon me by a Being much higher than I.

current events

I can't help but be bothered about all the news that I see on Facebook and the internet nowadays.  To be honest, it's pretty scary.

I really don't know what to make of them.  It just feels more real that the end is really nearing.

I feel a bit worried because when I become bothered about certain aspects in my life, it just disarms me from doing my tasks at hand.  However, I know I need to remain steadfast now more than ever.

Let's remain faithful about God's plans in our lives and for our world.

I love this

Never Misrepresent Your Product

'...Provide things honest in the sight of all men.' Romans 12:17

Eventually lies are exposed. The truth will always surface. 'He that covereth his sins shall not prosper' (Proverbs 28:13). Anyone who does business with you wants to know the truth - the whole truth. Jesus had the greatest product on earth: salvation. He offered the human race an opportunity to have a relationship with God. He even promised them a home in heaven. But He never painted a distorted picture. After talking about the advantages of following Him, He spelled out the challenges. 'Ye shall be hated of all nations for My name's sake' (Matthew 24:9). Jesus offered people more than a pie-in-the-sky philosophy. He believed in preparing people for every possible situation that could arise. In an age when bankers and businessmen twist the truth to enhance the bottom line, God calls on you to be honest, even to your own hurt. If you represent God, and if you want to experience His blessing, you must do business His way. An honest relationship is worth more than a hundred sales. Your integrity will be remembered longer than your product. We as a nation need to go back to what made us great in the first place. Thomas Jefferson said, 'The whole art of government consists in the art of being honest.' In the Bible, God's people were largely an agricultural community. So God laid it on the line: 'Do not use dishonest standards when measuring length, weight or quantity' (Leviticus 19:35 NIV). John Parnell wrote, 'It matters not what you do, make a nation or a shoe. For he who does an honest thing, in God's pure sight is ranked a king.'

Broken not destroyed

How appropriate is this quote? 

I've been having realizations on how broken I am... Broken but not destroyed. 

Thank God for these words... 

Hopeful for my restoration. 

Surprises

I love it when God speaks to me through the most unlikely people in the most unexpected circumstances. 

Sometimes these real life moments resonate more than actual sermons at Church. 

God is truly everywhere. 

I shall not worry coz God is taking care of me. I shall not complain because God is always blessing me. I shall not fear because God is always with me. 

I am happiest when...

I have been having my ups and downs... We all go through this.  And somehow... Today was pretty clear to me.

I was at mass and it was a pretty good one. Nothing out of the ordinary.. I went to mass with Celine.  After the mass, I asked her, "Celine, what did you learn in church today?"

Her answer was simple: "I learned that life is how you see it".

The Gospel today was about that woman who was accused of adultery and Jesus said something like, whoever has not sinned may cast the first stone...

That short conversation with Celine, with my own intention of instilling Christianity into my 9 year old sister - may have affected me more than it affected her.

Spending the first activity of the day with my sister and God set the tone for the rest of the day and I think today was a great day.

And so... It made me reflect on the things that make me happy.

So I'll start my list...

I'm happiest when...
(in no particular order)

• I'm with my family and just being a normal family... laughing, teasing each other, eating. 
• I'm with Chad 
• I'm cooking or baking 
• I'm putting makeup on other people and I could see the happiness in their eyes on how I enhanced their natural beauty 
• I'm with R&D and they're laughing and having a good time 
• I'm with my small group of close friends talking about anything and everything 
• I'm travelling - seeing a different culture similar yet different from what I'm used to and getting inspired by the differences and amazed by the similarities 
• I'm eating refreshing food and it revives my soul 
• I'm able to walk and able to take in all the sights, sounds, smells of the streets 
• I'm learning something new 
• I'm researching and there's a Eureka moment or a surge of new information sort of downloading inside my brain 
• I'm affirmed by God's words that He is real and He loves me 
• I'm shopping and find a great bargain
• I'm reading an interesting book and get so absorbed in the plot 
• I'm watching CSI 
• I'm watching Crime Investigation Channel or Law & Order with Chad 
• I'm able to meet acquaintances that turn into instant friends 
• I'm in Korea and someone talks to me in Korean and I can totally have a conversation at that given time 

I guess this list goes on and on... 

I'll just have to remind myself about all the things that make me happy whenever I'm down.  

life nowadays

nowadays i feel that i have good people i can rely on to be there with me when times are tough...

we're all fighting loads of battles but there's something affirming about the people i encounter everyday. it doesn't make me immune to panic or stress... but it just makes the load somewhat more bearable.  i can't say easy because it's still very hard.

a good insight i learned today is changing your mindset to what situation is given to you.  i'm a very easily flustered person... so this is hard for me.  however, i know i should work on myself to be more calm and level-headed just so i can troubleshoot in a more lucid manner.

i won't let worry consume me.  i have good people to stand by me and guide me and i have a God that's constantly trying to refine me by teaching me lessons.

i also appreciate spending time with family.. watching the kids, having a beer with my brother and my sister in law... it seems like it just makes me realize the important things in life and prevents me from focusing on the fleeting, superficial aspects of it.

LSS

recurring songs in my head...

til the end of my days
song of a servant

i have no other way to go through this than with prayer and faith in God

A Prayer of Surrender

Father, I abandon myself into your hands; do with me what you will. Whatever you may do, I thank you: I am ready for all, I accept all. Let only your will be done in me, and in all Your creatures - I wish no more than this, O Lord. Into your hands I commend my soul; I offer it to you with all the love of my heart, for I love you Lord, and so need to give myself, to surrender myself into your hands, without reserve, and with boundless confidence, For you are my Father. Amen.

Charles de Foucauld(1858-1916)

get used to it

it's a pretty peculiar thing knowing that every single time i wake up... face the day... i definitely know it's a challenging one.  

i don't know when this lurking feeling of doom will end but then again i also know God will always see me through.  

i was also thinking, if i didn't do what i was doing right now... i can't think of what i could be doing? sounds like a tongue twister.. haha but yeah life would be so boring and routinary. 

i still can't get used to it... i don't think i'll ever will... but I thank God for the opportunity to be doing what i'm doing... being part of a team to make a small change in the Philippines and how things are run over here. 

so challenging... but then again, nothing worth it ever comes easy.  

photo from pinterest.com

ramblings at 4:50am

there's just not enough hours in a day, days in a week, weeks in a month, month in a year...

each day should be lived to the fullest. time is something that we are privileged to have but it's also something we shouldn't waste.

in my 20's i could say i still have a lot of time left on me... however, last night, on uberfact's (oh yes! such a reliable source of information thru twitter) it says there that left-handed people like me die 9 years earlier on the average than right-handed people...

what? so being more creative than the righties actually have a price?

anyway, i just think that days should be spent in anger and frustration.. it should be spending appreciating what you have, being grateful for the present and working hard for your goals, whatever they may be.

such realizations coming to me at 4:50 in the morning... my body clock and sleep patterns are pretty messed up.